Summer Together: Tips for a Smooth Transition When Your College Student Returns Home

Hallelujah, they're back! Your college student has returned to the Arizona sunshine, bringing with them tales of dorm life, newfound knowledge (hopefully!), and a mountain of laundry that seems to multiply by the hour. While the initial excitement of having them home is wonderful, the transition back to living under the same roof can sometimes feel a little… bumpy. Fear not, fellow Arizona parents! With a little proactive planning and a focus on positive interaction, you can navigate this summer together with more harmony than a chorus of cicadas on a warm evening.

The key here is to shift from the parent-child dynamic of their high school years to a more adult-to-adult relationship. They're not kids anymore; they're young adults forging their own paths. As Arnett (2000) discusses in his theory of emerging adulthood, this is a period of exploration and transition. Their return home is often a temporary stop on that journey, and our role as parents shifts to providing support and understanding.

Here are some tips to foster a smooth and positive summer together:

• Embrace the Change: Recognize that your student has likely grown and changed during their time away. Be open to their new perspectives and experiences. Ask them about their studies, their friends, and what they've learned – really listen.

• Establish Flexible Routines: Forget the rigid schedules of their high school days. Encourage them to be responsible, but also allow for the flexibility that comes with summer break. Maybe they sleep in a bit later – that's okay (within reason!).

• Focus on Connection, Not Control: Instead of laying down a long list of rules, focus on creating opportunities for connection. This could be as simple as having regular family dinners (maybe firing up the grill!), watching a movie together, or taking a weekend trip to explore another part of Arizona.

• Support Their Goals: Whether they're looking for a summer job, pursuing an internship, or simply trying to relax and recharge, offer your support. Ask how you can help them achieve their goals.

• Navigate Social Lives with Understanding: They'll likely want to reconnect with high school friends and spend time with their college buddies who might also be in town. Be understanding of their social needs, while also setting reasonable expectations about communication and safety.

• Practice Active Listening: When they do want to talk, put down your phone, make eye contact, and truly listen to what they have to say. This builds trust and strengthens your connection.

• Find Common Ground: Explore activities you can enjoy together. Maybe it's trying a new restaurant, going to a spring training game (if the timing is right!), or revisiting a favorite hiking trail. Shared experiences can create positive memories.

• Humor is Your Friend: Don't be afraid to laugh together! Lightheartedness can diffuse tension and make the transition smoother for everyone. Embrace the funny moments, even if they involve questionable college stories (within reason, of course!).

Remember, this summer is a temporary phase. By focusing on open communication, mutual respect, and creating opportunities for positive interaction, you can make this time a valuable and enjoyable experience for both you and your returning young adult. It's a chance to reconnect on a different level and support them as they continue their journey into adulthood – all under the beautiful Arizona sky.

If you or your college kid need a little extra support, hit us up!

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Reference:

Arnett, J. J. (2000). Emerging adulthood: A theory of development from the late teens through the twenties. American Psychologist, 55(5), 469–480. 1  [Insert actual DOI or URL if available]